Unfinished Business

While in Arkansas over the Christmas holiday, at church someone told me that my friend, Tracy, had died. He would only have been in his early fifties.

Tracy had an interesting religious pilgrimage. He was raised Jewish but experimented with Buddhism. He was finally converted through his sister's influence, a member of what is now the International Church of Christ. When I met Tracy, he was attending a "mainline" church.

Tracy was the first person to ever invite me to a Church of Christ. I met him at the bookstore where he was proprietor. I was too shy and intimidated to be interested in the larger assembly, so he invited me to a men's Bible study. I was almost persuaded to make the commitment that I knew was right according to the scriptures.

When the on-staff Evangelist got a hold of me, he threw so many scriptures at me that I ran out of excuses. So I was baptized. Tracy was always glad to have had a hand in my conversion. He would sometimes say that I was his victory. He was especially elated when I became a preacher.

The night of my baptism, Tracy and I walked through Wendy's drive-thru, my hair still wet. Then we went to my house where we did some improvisational jamming on the four track. We turned on the pre-recorded drum machine track. I played bass and Tracy played lead. I still have the tape.

Tracy was one of the few friends who attended my wedding. As I recall, the ushers weren't able to evenly divide the bride's side and groom's side of the auditorium because it would be woefully lopsided. There were far more people there for Gretchen. Tracy was special because he was there for me.

The night before the wedding, Tracy and I went out with several friends to see the first Batman movie with Michael Keaton. Since it was Tracy's fifth time to see it, he annoyed me by quoting all the good lines about a nanosecond before the actors. But it was my third time to see it.

Once I became "grounded" I was annoyed by Tracy's scripted Jewish prayers he silently said with lips moving during communion. Didn't he know that all that stuff was nailed to the cross? How little I understood back then about our Jewish roots in Christ.

After I moved from Arkansas, Tracy had a debilitating stroke. He had never married, so he moved to the coast to be near his family of origin. I got an address for him at an assisted living facility where he resided. I wrote to him and told him what he meant to me. I credited how far I had come to God's use of Tracy in my life. It was a long, flowery letter.

Tracy never answered. He was always a procrastinator. I got busy and never got around to writing again. I was a procrastinator as well. But now I wish I had tried again. I wish I had kept in touch. I wish I had looked him up and gone to see him. You just kind of think that you can put things off and people will still be there.

I console myself with the notion that Tracy must have read the letter. I like to think that he knew how important he was to me. But I wish I had five more minutes with him on this earth so I could say it and know that he heard. I wish I could hear him quote all the good lines from Batman and I wish I could listen to his Jewish prayers. I wish I could take care of what feels like unfinished business.

There are others in my life, without whom, I would not be where I am. I'm resolved to make it a point to tell them about their powerful influence.

If you have unfinished business, don't leave it unfinished. Perhaps it's time to be tolerant of a loved one's quirkiness, imagining the worse alternative of life without this person. If you need to forgive and reconcile, do it. If you need to say I love you, say it.  Do it now before you run out of opportunities.      

Comments

[preacherman]

Wade,
This post brought tears to my eyes.
I priase God for Tracy. I am so thankful for His influence in your life and baptizing you. Where would you be? what you be doing? I wouldn't have met you? You wouldn't have made the difference that you have made in my life. I love you so much brother and I thank God for the relationship and the friendship that we have. You have been such a blessing in my life Wade and I want you to never forget that!

[Wade Tannehill]

Preacherman,

It was the on-staff Evangelist who actually did the hands on baptizing, but Tracy was the one who made the initial connection.

I hope I've communicated to you how important our relationship is to me as well.

[Frank]

. . . What a great post. Thanks for reminding us of what we know, but rarely act on.

[Gallagher]

Wade,

WOW and excellent!You are in our prayers dealing with the loss of a friend.

By the way, nice to see you back.

[Vicki]

Wade,
As I read your blog, tears began to stream down my face. What a lovely written tribute!

I have only contacted one person from my past several years ago to share what a difference they made in my walk with Christ. He gave me my first Bible outside of my family...even having my name engraved on the cover. That made it more special and memorable as a child under six. I still have it to this day. He is now 84 years old and will still witness to anyone who will listen. However, I have wanted to contact two special men for years to thank them and share with them what a difference they made when I was a child and still make in my life to this day. They visited our home several times trying to convince my parents to allow me to go to church on their bus. They wouldn't give up and finally I was allowed to go. I had to get up early on my own. They made the ride such fun with songs and laughter. I just knew where we were going had to be a great place. I knew very little about God or church. It was because of their persistance that I was able to not only see the need for God in my life, but accept Him into mine. You have inspired me to stop procrastinating and allowing distractions to prevent me from following through with my search.

I think we should take it even farther and possibly find those who knew us before our conversion and share Christ with them as well. Who knows, maybe they have already converted!

[john dobbs]

Excellent, Wade....really. Thanks for sharing that...and I'm sorry for the loss of your friend.

I have thought often about the preacher who had such an influence over me in my formative years. His name was Richard Travis and his wife was Nancy. After I went to college he called me once. I didn't get his number. I have never been able to contact him since. I want to thank him for taking me visiting, making me speak at Rotary when I was 14, and for immersing me into Jesus. I really loved Richard and thought he was a wonderful man. The next preacher was Dallas Lockhart and I have had opportunity to visit with him many times over the years.

Blessings to you my friend.

[Keith]

Wade-
Great post. If you have time for a quick read, pick up Mitch Albom's For One More Day. Very similar to this post, just longer.

[bv1968]

I think I remember Tracy. Thanks for sharing about him. God does touch us with the "strangest" of people. I do remember your wedding though ... I remember asking "How did he luck out with Gretchen!!"

Shalom,
Bobby Valentine

First post from Tucson

[Royce Ogle]

One of the kindnesses God shows toward us is to bring such absolutely wonderful people into our lives. And, to bring folks like you along to remind me of the people in my life who have loved me most, yet quietly.

I have a Tracy or two in my past too. Thanks Wade for this tender story of Christian love.

Grace and Peace,
Royce Ogle

[Jim Martin]

Wade,
This is a very good thoughtful piece. This is very well done. Thanks for this story.

[Trey Morgan]

There are a few people in my past that I need to reconnect with to tell them how I feel about them. Thanks for reminding me to "get it done" while it's still possible.

Trey

[paula harrington]

Thanks for this post Wade.

[Darin]

Thanks Wade.